unrealistic.

ok, its not realistic at all. im suddenly swarm with anxiety. im pretty sure i've presented everything today, but something is so wrong here, did i really pass up everything ? did i finish my hmw ? shit, still need to do wat yar ? goshhhh, im suddenly so anxious now. T______T everything happen like a lightning strike, im still not use to the boredom im feeling now, i need something to do or some activities to warm me up , to fill up the emptyness. its getting pretty scary, thinking of projects and assignments now and then although everything is over and i have a freaking 4 months hols. i need to do something , something . . . to get rid off this anxiety. gonna email for intern tomoro and do some room chores, read some books and watch some movies. . . . hopefully i dun wake up in anxiety like i alway does usually.

LET ME REPEAT THIS ONCE AGAIN !

ADELIME TAN I-YING , U R OFFICIALLY OFF FOR 4 MONTHS, STOP THINKING OF ASSIGNMENTS !

bestest friends.

ouwhhh ! i reli miss my bestest friend so so so much . =( it seems like a decade since we gossip and exchange lil' useless topics and we-think-its-a-secret kind of secret . Those days were the best, we would phone each other every single day. (yes, seeing each other in class is just not enough for both of us =) ) we would talk talk, chat chat, gossip, gossip till our parents have to pay the shocking bill >.<>what u and hui ying always talk r ? so many things to say wan meh, canot go to school and talk meh . HAHAHA. and i would always reply OF COURSE CANOT LAR. CANOT WAIT LAR~ =P ouwwh, i miss her. she is literally my other half, she is the shadow of me, she is my pillar of support when i was unhappy. true enough we have our fair share of ups and downs, there was a period where both of us was so freaking busy with our own life that we left out each other from our lives. and i almost thought, ok we are done ! i accepted the fact that, we cant keep someone to ourself, people change, so do us. may be this is where our frindship stop and i shud jz let it go and be grateful for the fact that we were once the bestest friend. i cried so hard when i finally decided on that fact. silly me. i should have know, good friends, mutual friends, buddies, strangers may walk out of your life but not your bestest friend ! u cant just throw those years of friendship down the river and forget about it. bestest friend stays forever permanently. she's my emma, im her liv =) we are now the same as before ! it had never been better. =D in fact, bare in mind that, friendship needs time investment, dun ever shoo friends off with the excuse of being busy. they are where we are now.

we cant wait to see each other. im counting off the days till we meet, when that time comes, i wan to hear the full story of yesterday's cut short version of when rock star meets classic princess =D . love u much =D

here's a note by my ex-english tutor that i think is worth pondering on.

" So are you still BUSY? I'm sure there's a moment in time that we are not. If you could have time to chat online with a random stranger, you could have picked up the phone and call your dear friend. If you could have the time to play games at home, you could have spend the evening for a football game (example) with your friends or even coffee...If your friends could spend time for you, why can't you? People are too keen to make new and more friends, but they just freaking don't know how to retain those friends they make...It's not the volume, it's the quality. "

stay posotive.

so, its really not dat exciting anymore counting to the days till we have our long hols. its actually gettting stressfull and annoying, really. the start of the long hols means its the end of the big ass final project. . .. . . which seems no where now. i cant see the process and the ending. its slowly, slowly injecting fear into me. im trying to cope with all the stress and all, keeping my fingers cross now. and im so freaking annoyed of myself, why am i always in a sleepy mode. it only got worse after burning midnight oil for 8 days. after submitting the final model, i totally lost my spirit and soul. i sleep all day long whenever i can. rest turn into short nap, short nap turns into deeep lonng sleep. T______T . i cant afford to be sleepy nowadays, there is definitely something wrong with my body system now. 19 days ! 19 freaking days to my long hols, and to the deadline of my final ! WOOT ! praying real hard for it. smile , smile, SMILE =) i am happy, glad and appreciate all the comfort and encouragement i receive from my mates. all the best to all of us ! jiayou !

* like what alvin says , THINK POSITIVE, STAY POSITIVE, GOOD MORNING =D

so near yet so far.

we are best friends, but we are so near yet so far. when i look back at my photos now, i realise that you're missing in most. when i looked at your's i too realise i was not in most of your pictures. i wish i could be n coz those pictures look great. it make me wonder why it wasn't me on the pictures. why i never knew this till i saw the pictures. i wonder if we will still look good in pictures together.

FML

no words can really express what im going thru and feeling right now. The only appropriate word that i can think of is . MY LIFE MACAM SHIT !

I HATE MODEL -MAKING TO THE MAX !

I HATE MEASURING !

I HATE COLOUR SPRAY !

I HATE NT CUTTER !

I HATE PRINTING EVERYTHING IN COLOURS !

I HATE GOING TO EXPEDITE !

I HATE EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THE WORD " INTERIOR " OR " ARCHITECTURE "

I HATE EVERYTHING !

MY LIFE RIGHT NOW SUCKS BIG TIME !

* im looking forward to monday. after monday. im gona sleep hard and play hard. * for one day *

FML !

its been a long time !

ellooo ! ok i knw its been a long time since i blog. bout a month ago ??! have been burried under a huge bundle of assignments and projects ! i barely can breath till now ! which is the so called * holiday * =.= deep breathe * i cant imagine the crazy workloads that im gonna face for the next coming weeks ! but the good news is, its the freaking long hols sooooon !!! =) yeepee . cant wait for the trips with my frens. lalala ~ but before i step my foot onto the ground of pleasure, i'll have to cross de bridge of hell first ! wish me luck !

anyway ! i've deleted my previous post which i frown at everytime i log in my blog! its not me really. so just forget about it ! i was boling hot back then, in a hurry to complete my 3ds. * look at what projects did to me ! they turn me into a tigress ! * =( .

i've done another music brochure ! =) turn out pretty fine =) although its for free again. i do hope i can have more to do in the big hols, which may be i can start charging them ! im more happy doing graphics =) considering going for intern in the bigb hols too, but its still in the process. wait till i manage to escape from the bridge of hell first =)

p/s : buh bye, its another lousy post. oh ! i have two new roomies ! two lil cute one, hope to get along well with them ! but none of them beats cayenne and zhinee =) miss them occasionally.

cure that pain please

help T__________T. can someone just wake up and sent me to a clinic nowwwww =( ! WAKE UP EVERYONEEEEEEE ANYONE ! im half dead now ! of all the time u had to come at this time ! in the middle of 4 am ! after coming back from hoay phing's belated b'day, i went to bed early. for two hours i endure de pain of gastric, and finally i cant take it anymore T_______T its killing me man ! and everyone is asleep =( and i naively tot aww how good i can sleep early tonight n wake up fresh for tomoro's lecture =( hope it goes off before 6, at least i have 2 more hours left of sleep.

im starting to get really worried about my health now. all my family members have the record of serious gastric except me. and now, im having it too. thanks to my unhealty diet and eating style =( its not the first time now. hav been complaining of stomach ache for de pass few days ! omg, cayenne help me ....am i having stomach cancer ??? =( its not like im forcing myself to go on diet, but im jz too lazy to tapao or cook . i have no motivation to cook now. and i dun even feel hungry, not until dinner time. had been having one meal a day this few days, and after every freaking meal ! i get gastric !!!! GRRRrrrrrrrrrr. im real scare now. i dunwan to have gastric like my parents. its so bloody torturing. i promise i will start eating normal from tomoro .....please just cure that pain T_____________T i want to sleep =(


hope the medicine i consume just now helps ! =( T_____________T

see you next time =)

whenever someone leaves room1. i drown myself into a complete denial state, refusing to actually accept that i have yet another goodbye to bid. The business of bidding goodbye have never been "use to it" for me. i hate bidding goodbye in blogspot to roomies, i hate reliving the time we spend together, but then , thats the only way for me to express what i couldn't say face to face and they all deserve a post from me =)

dear zhini =),

im so happy to have u as my roomie. u r so far one of the most quirky yet fun and full of knowledge roomie i ever had =) *im lucky and gratefull to have all wonderfull roomies*

i love chatting with you =) i love being temporary very *kepochi* about the entertainment industry =) it has alwayz been a fruitful discussion which nobody but you and i are interested in =) if not for ur existence as a student in kbu, i would think that may be you are one of the paparazzies =)

you are the only friend that actually agrees with me on the great potential of the late yasmin ahmad's production. i guesse i will never have that same passionate respond again. =( * who want to teman me go watch yasmin ahmad's production in cinema huh ?

i seriously and with respect salute u for your great ability in chinese writting. i love every words that you type out in your blog, i love the way you express yourself with your own magical words =) for a dummy in chinese like me, your words are an inspiration =) im not exagerating ya, u seriously have to continue blogging ok ! i dunno why , but im addicted to your words and style of writting =) keep it up !

like cayenne, i would like to say thank you for all the patience and tolerances with me. i know i know, im not a clean freak. *sigh, this would be the only thing i felt so sorry* sorry and thank you again =)

will surely miss another hungry ghost in the middle of the night =) u made me feel better having maggie in the middle of 3. who will teman me eat supper again huh ?*sigh. . .. i have to find another victim now . . . .

you are also one of the few among my frens that would discuss about the hypocrisy of the politic world with me. will surely miss those chats and discussions =)

for such a young age, you are one hell of a genius ! u know almost everything ! from the entertainment industry to the world of politics ! i feel so small T__T keep it up ya zhini =)

to end everything in short, you are unique, smart, small, quirky, and knowledable =) nice knowing you. we may never meet again, or we may meet again in one fine day , u have my deepest earnest regards =) its not going to be a smooth sail doing yout degrees , hope everything sail smoothly ALL THE BEST =) * to me you are always the smart one =) *


朋友当中最" HIAO " 的 LING ZHI NI -------------------------- 再见咯 =)


p/s : 下次见面时我要看到穿乞丐裤，背着乞丐包，拖着乞丐鞋的你哦 =）



慕橙上