emo

went thru ur profile , saw ur pics and realise u actually did come bc to malacca. T_________T
im speechless. and to think that we sms on the day when u act did come bc but didnt tell me, and when u didnt reply my msn messages when u reli did come bc , was a stab in my heart. may be im wrong about our friendship all the time T_____________T. how can u do this to me ?? when we were so close once before. all the promises that we made are all craps and bullshit huh? i didnt expect u to come back everytime to go out with me , or to hangout with me. i just hope that u can tell me when u come bc , u knw, so called once bestest frens. T____________T

may be friendship do change, or am i the one who havent grow up yet? it gotta be me rite ? im still dat stupid innocent girl that holds on to our relationship tightly like a precious gem. im the only one that keep on putting the effort to stay close together, may be u loathed it. im sorry that i've turn out to be a friend that u have to hide ur whereabout from. i shud jz grow up ! our friendship will never go back rite ? things do change. dun worry, i get it now.


just for this once , for the entire 7 years of being my best best besties and soulmate

I HATE U !

plain gabbling ~

phew ~ just finish helping my papa marking english exam papers and recording marks. guesse what ! im all alone doin it dwnstair while my dearest papa is fast asleep upstair ! haahaa.....well, i dun mind act, since i cant sleep might as well do some work =)

tomoro is school reopen for the kids after two weeks of holidays, and my "very efficient" papa left all the papers till the last day to mark =.= . NO, actually is for me to mark ! haah . I got a huge surprise from marking the papers ! "huge" . so my father gave instructions and rule of marking to me, and then ! he said : when u record the marks rite, see carefully the names ya , my class got alot of idiots who cant even spell their names! some dun even knw their full name ! my response was HAAAHAAAAA, THATS A JOKE ! * continue marking *

THEN ! tadahhhh ! i met the idiot. OMG ! how can someone totally miss-spelled his/her own name ?? HOW WOULD IT BE ?? may be its acceptable if its a small miss-spelled in it, BUT this fellow sure didnt make a small mistake ! his name was :

VIRNESSWARAAN A/L RASAJAM
and he spelled it :
RIVIKINESWARAAN

i have a strong feeling he didn't forgot his full name, HE DUNO WAT IS IT ! i wasted time looking for god-knows-how many times in the name list for his name, and my father pointed it out in one minute. kanasai! honestly , i felt sad for him. not knowing ur own name is a disaster, imagine having to write ur name in exams or to fill form, but u duno the exact spelling of ur name, and u have to simply scribble one. that is soooooo sad, ur name is ur identity ! well, its his name not my name~ my father is so goin to whack him, and he deserve it.

after finish marking, i totally support the education ministry's idea of making English language a MUST-PASS subject equivalent to bahasa malaysia. all the papers that i have mark are mostly malay's and the most they get out of 15 is 4 , imagine that. for so many yrs we chinese thrive hard to pass in bahasa malaysia, no doubt we done well. so now, its ur turn to thrive as hard to pass English. im not saying all chinese is good in English * i myself hav alot to work on* and all malays are bad in it, but as overall, it seems so. Its high time our contry improve now.

ok ! finish gabbling. time for beeeed. night blog ^^

deep thoughts

sometimes, i think im a hypocrite. i often remind myself and is proud of myself for being a person who value friendship as much as my family. i boasted around how much friendship means to me. i gave wise words to people to handle their relationship with their friends, i find reasons for them to appreciate that someone which they hate and find faults with.

but i failed long time ago, to do that myself.

pimples breakout !!!!

arghhhhh !!!! big big gigiantic pimples loaded with yellowish liquid inside, one poke BURST ! ooze out together with fresh red blood ! *sobz*...when is my pimples goin away ?? i've been staying at home for a week now, no face to meet people. I WANA GO OUT ! .....huhuhu...please fast fast go away. dun stay there forever, i still have dates with frens to go ot with.....*sobz*

p/s : pray to god that tomoro my face will be clean&clear , then i can go eat satay celup =) *im nt goin anywhere unless this thing goes off *

pp/s : people are pissed off because im nt replying smses. holy great . now i have to sms double to say sorry. GREAT!...they expect me to reply when wat they ask is just wat r u doin , eat d ? hw r u today ? *cycle repeat from morning to midnight* EVERY FREAKING DAY .

good morning world

GOOD MORNING WORLD ! woooo ! im up early today ! super duper early, 7:30 , imagine that ! after coming back from kl , i slept my butt off as much as i can, u knw i appreciate my beauty-sleep very much nowadays. cant blame me =) i've been sleeping in clockwise hours in kl. i would rather sleep than go anywhere =)

today was exceptional, coz my dad called someone to modify our roof. lately there's been lotsa break-ins in our area. so, we gotta wake up early to prevent dust while the workers knock off the roof and add in some secret weapon to prevent thieves =)

now, im at my grandma house doing nothing , so sleepy=( can feel my eyes closing, yet i can still blog , hehee. urghhhh! i cant upload photos to facebook beacause of low connection, sigh. but im still thankful that i at least hav a connection. cant ask for more, will die of boredom if cant go online. i'll just have to go to someone's house to upload de photos den.

*eyes fully close* im just babbling...that happens when im sleepy ...buh byeeeeee....im off dreamin now....gona sleep. yawn... * mode off *

p/s : renee, in case u drop by here, sorry , cant upload the photos. low connection. will try to uploas it as fast as i can ~

A once in a blue moon trip =)

At last, a once in a blue moon trip. everytime goin on trips with kl friends, i would enjoy every trip telling myself it would be a hundred times better if i were to go with my malacca bunch of friends. Then i would start dreaming , ahhh....with hui ying and all, it will be an awesome trip =). so the first thing on my mind when i came bc for my hols was to plan a small gathering trip. well, its kind of a dissapoinment for me, many of them cant make it b'coz of studies and jobs especially my soulmate -hui ying =( but still, im glad for this trip which brings me to meet up with some old faces and new faces =)

ok handsup ! i surrender, next to cats, another thing that i fear is heights ! in spite of friends teasing me while on the cable car, i brave myself to deny it. and it sure sucks ! huhuhu, dats the second time in my entire life being on that wobbly thinghy ! imagine it hanging up only-god-knws how high !! wobbling all thru the journey =( and it doesnt help with people teasing u somemore! cant blame me wat, im scare of heights ler xp. it freak me out when it first move, but better later on. thank god.

karaoke at genting was nt as expensive as i think. in fact its cheap .

unfortunately, which to me is fortunately, we decided to not go to theme park and instead just hang around , chit -chat together. you see, i have this love-hate affair with theme parks. i love being there looking at the crowds with happy faces , screaming their lungs off as if trying to scream away their troubles & stressful life, small kids hugging gigantic teddy bears. i love it all BUT, i dunwan to be part of them =( nope, i dunwan to scream my lungs off. being thru once and its terrifying ! blame me for being a chicken . blame it to heights. i'm satisfied enuf to just be a spectator...heeehe =) and well off camwhore-ing =)

dear kah ling was attacked by headache from the beginning of the trip till the end, which pretty much explain her moodiness and my quite-down mood. she was the closest to me compare to the others, naturally i have to teman her and make sure she enjoy this trip. if she needs a rest i'll hav to make sure she gets her rest. base on her reaction & mood during de trip, i think i didnt do a great job. so sorry kahling for nt making this trip awesome for you. sorry. felt guilty =(

cant say that its an awesome trip,but still i'm glad for it. when will be able to have a trip like this again ? it will be ages i think. everyone scattered in places to study as well as work, busy with their own life, its a miracle if we can ever gather properly, with everyone turning up. *let me make that as my birthday wish* i have to wish for that. thats how hard it is for us to be able to gather together.

studying in kl has made me miss all of my malacca friends more than ever, although we seldom meet up and keep in contact, i love u guys nonetheless & appreciate everyone of you =)* looking forward to having a blasting trip with u guys, which i shall wish it may come soon one of these days.*

p/s : to those that didnt make it to the trip : huiying,mingyong,cailing,shiyin,renee,ahkiat,yufatt,wailoon, love u guys too =)

pp/s: yeo hui ying, told u i wont be myself without u ! u r the missing piece to me soulmate ! miss u ! better get ur butt back here before i die of boredom !

~ cheers to friendship ~

my results are out~

a failure ~ i work super hard for my yr one. i shed blood , tears and sweat. i sacrifice my health mentally and physically and rejected alot of friend's request to meet up in malacca, i miss out lotsa fren's b'day. for that everything, i got a "B". GREAT~ so great. does this mean im not working hard ? is it true ? dat im slacking ? i've never work so hard for my entire life, but it doesnt seems enuff.

friends comfort and encourage me dat "B" is nt bad d.... act is very good.... they just didnt c how hard i work for it and in the design stream, getting a "B" is a slap in ur face if u wanna succed. goin thru year one is alredy a tough thing, overcoming every obstacle that i face with tears and phsycho myself to keep goin on with the stress that i often thought will one day kill me ~ looks like i'll have to go extra extra extra super duper hard for my year two. and i hope i can pull thru it. there will be more tears, more blood and more sweat. "looking forward to it"

the only thing dat is on the bright side is, everytime after the end of one sem i alwez thought, dis time im reli through wit it, my passion has faded i give up. BUT apparently, it doesnt =) luckily i can say, if nt im goin to live a hell goin thru another two years. after all the stress blood sweat and tears, i still have high hopes and great dreams for it. =) so, this holiday turns out to be a good thing for me. i fully used evry holiday to recharge and re "find" my half-lost passion that was burried under the stressfulness and workload. im so glad that passion found its way home =)

*deep breath* tell myself , im goin to work extra super duper tripple harder ( i'll leave quadrupple for year 3) for year 2. i knw i can do it, just dat tiny little bit more. im glad i have my passion back now,without it i'll never get thru another 2 years. =) year 2 here i come in another 3 months .

wish me luck in goin thru another deeper level phase of hell.

im waiting ......

im waiting for photos julian , before i can post them up.
im waiting for phone calls.
im waiting to experiment on someone's reaction.
im waiting for u to make the first step.
im waiting for ur "next week" reply ms huwi hwi.
im waiting for u to buy me that papa.
im waiting for u to come back hui ying, so that we can at least meet ONCE in my 5 months hols.
im waiting for the satay celup night guys.
im waiting for a beach/pulau trip guys.
im waiting for ur sms reply dear.
im waiting for u to stop bugging me, coz im tired of u.
im waiting for someone important to accept me in facebook friend's request.
im waiting to go out with my dear ming yong.
im waiting to go to my grandma house to stay for a day or two

NOW, im waiting for my mum to fetch me out !